(aka how I got my sons to be active participants in the way our household runs)
First off, let me just state that I am NOT Supermom. My kids have tantrums, all my ideas don’t necessarily work - all the time, and I have been known to yell from time to time (like today). However, I have found ways to get my children to happily participate in the way our household runs. “Chores” is not a bad word in our house.
With our second child, we learned early on that in order for him to be successful, he needed to be in charge, or in charge as much as we could let him. Letting children make their own decisions gives them ownership of the situation and can help them learn to behave well.
Last week, I mentioned monitoring my child’s progress through an incentive chart to achieve a certain goal - staying in bed for my older son and potty training with my younger one. Incentive charts can be a useful tool for teaching a child a new skill or desired repeatable behavior, from picking up toys to folding clothes to clearing the table without being asked. The key is consistency.
I cherish the time I spend with my children, especially my older son. During the school year, he spends the majority of his waking hours at school with another adult and other children. So, our time together is all the more special. During the summer, though, when we’re together ALL THE TIME, we have to adjust. Oftentimes I find myself on the short end of the temper-stick. Here are some things I do to keep my cool during the heat of the summer:
Do you ever have that feeling that no one is listening to you? That feeling usually happens for me when I say magical phrases like, “pick up your toys” or “brush your teeth”. Good listening skills are not something we are all born with; they are an acquired skill. Here are several ways to teach your child to be a good listener:
Goodness knows that my older son is a schedule-kid. He thrives on routine and repetitiveness. He also has a tough time handling transitions or change, typically when he isn’t prepared for them. Here are some tips we use to make transitions easier.
I have several friends who will tell me over and over that their child simply does not respond to time-outs. I always ask about their time-out when they tell me this, and more often than not, I find that the concept of “time-out” is simply misunderstood and not used effectively. Follow these steps in order to provide a positive learning experience for your child through time-outs.
For the past week or two, I’ve published little snippets of discipline strategies as ideas or even reminders for us all. With summer here (and school out), I’ve found myself needing to re-evaluate our “game plan” at home and set some ground rules. Being consistent and clear in directions, and providing meaningful and effective consequences can establish the groundwork for a good, solid relationship with your child. It is equally important to give your child plenty of praise. Catching them being good, and letting them know about it, can be just as effective, if not moreso than many other forms of discipline.
